First Blog Post Since Dec 6th

Good lord, what was I thinking?! I have no readers (Hi Chris!) and if I did they wouldn't want to read about my relationship status!

So, I want attention. I want it bad, don't all women want attention though? No, SEXIST! Jesus... SIGH!!! I have been doing exams lately and my brain is fried. Currently on the phone debating nuclear bombs and Age Of Empires... THIS IS AWFUL! I DON'T WANT TO POST THIS! I HAVE NOTHING TO SAY! Uuuurgh.... [/brain] .....................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................

My life is over, obviously.

A brief summary of the social happenings this week...

Saturday: Hung out with a friend and the boyfriend.

Sunday: Went for a walk with the boyfriend.

Monday: Wrote songs with a couple of friends.

Tuesday: Hung out with the boyfriend.

Wednesday: Another walk with the boyfriend.

Thursday: Hung out with the boyfriend.

Friday: Hung out with friends and boyfriend, had dinner with the boyfriend and his mother, had drinks with the boyfriend and my family.

Saturday: Went for brunch with best friend and boyfriend, went to stock up on nerd supplies with the boyfriend, ate with the boyfriend, pre-pub bottle of Jack with the boyfriend and his guy friends, got dressed and ready with the boyfriend, went for drinks with the boyfriend and some friends.

See the problem? The problem is this: I am in a fresh, shiny, new relationship. It's horrible. All I do anymore is sigh and hold hands and talk about how pretty I am. And of course, half of me is saying "Once you get used to each other things will be normal again," and the other half is saying "Run like fuck!!" ...because I love him and this is not me! Hell, it's not even him! This is exactly how it wasn't supposed to be! *headdesk* I don't even know what more to say about it......Next week, I don't want to see him!!

{edit: feeling the impact was not obvious enough at first, I've oragified the problem for emphasis}

Heehee boys and shopping and shoes and...*headdesk* NO! RRGH!!

Oh blogosphere, what is happening to me?! My days off have taken a sharp downward turn from debating and songwriting, to hanging around some man who, for rather obvious reasons, I'm not naming here.

So today is Saturday. Glorious, lovely Saturday. A day for shouting matches about political or philosophical views. A day for running free through the planes with a herd of wild ponies (herd?)... A day for ME, to rest and have fun and be productive. But no, instead I find myself teaming up with a guy to buy €15 worth of sugary sweets and listen to Led Zeppelin. The more I love this utter waste of time, the more I hate myself.

Tonight, the world and their mother are going for drinks in town. And I am not. This week, I was so foolish as to see a doctor who diagnosed me with severe insomnia and has put me on Xanax. So I can't go out at night, because I now have a bedtime. Yes, I'm all grown up now and have a bedtime again. Of course, I would typically go out almost every weekend so it is not a huge loss. Except that the aforementioned male specimen has requested I join the familiar motley crew tonight. It's killing me. I wish I could go.

And just a point of information before I go:- Xanax does not work!