If I had warts on my nose and Tim Burton's hair [Unrealistic Dream #3]

I would want to be “The Cat Lady”…

Rather like yesterday’s romanticized view of homelessness, this is another thing I would do by choice despite typical standards. I, myself, am terrified of cats in real life but in this particular fantasy, I would live amongst them and call them my babies. As a child in Ireland, nobody was so story-book stereotypical but I’ve always imagined dark blue bungalows with wraparound porches on dirt roads. The house would, of course, be in a state of disrepair and the garden would be unkempt. At Halloween, mothers would warn their children not to knock at my door because throughout the locality there would be whispers of my hermitic insanity. Of course, if anyone were to come to my house and ask how I was doing they would find someone wise or articulate standing before them and smiling politely and yet I would never venture into the real world, except to steal the neighbors’ cats dressed oddly in a series of shawls and cloaks, looking almost like a pile of laundry.
Young children would call me “The Witch” and I would smile when I heard them, instilling fear into their young hearts by making solid and undeniable eye contact.